And a long title is better than . . . well, maybe not.
Well . . . I’m not dead. That would probably make a much better title.
You know? I find the thought of being back on this blog extremely hilarious. I don’t even know how long it’s been. (Well, that’s a lie. I kind of do) But, I don’t need to tell you all that this blog has been seriously neglected. What’s even worse is that this wasn’t even because I forgot about it. Because I hadn’t. I still remembered it existed. And I’d like to think that the reason I posted nothing in almost three months was because I had just been busy. That’s definitely better than the real reason, which is that I just couldn’t be bothered to put in the effort and found it more useful to procrastinate, literally doing nothing.
Okay. I could ramble on far longer about that, but that’s enough of that. And as is the norm for me for when I come back from a ridiculously long break from blogging, I tend to update you on my shenanigans with my writing. Right?
Sorry. I needed to put that sigh in, because this is just going to be the same old *bleep* all over again.
First thing’s first. I ‘won’ NaNoWriMo. Managed to write 50 000 words in a month. Yay? Well, I’d say yay if the thing wasn’t swamped with plot holes. Plot holes that are absolutely ridiculous. I mean, I guess the mentality of NaNo is to just write and write and not look back, but seriously. This was some seriously dreadful stuff. Anyway, I think it’s needless to say that I didn’t actually finish my NaNo novel.
Why, I hear none of you ask?
Well, I’m sure in any of my other blog posts you’d see me talking about how important planning is, but how I just can’t be bothered to do it. But then in my very last post, before I took a three month break, I said that I would actually write an outline that I would actually follow that would actually help me finish my first draft.
So, here’s a new rule that I want you all to follow.
Never listen to a thing I say on this blog. If I say I’m going to do something, it’s probably not gonna happen. If I say I promise I’ll try to do something (like stay active), it’s definitely not going to happen.
So, no. I didn’t make a plan for my current work in constant progress. No. I didn’t finish it. No. I didn’t even stick to the little outline I made for the prologue. And as is so incredibly foreseeable when it comes to me and writing that it’s no longer even that surprising for me anymore, No. I haven’t stuck with the idea that I wrote for NaNo.
So, to put it simply. I have started again. Again.
From the very first idea I had with these characters, I can’t tell you all the times that I’ve reworked them, remodelled them, redone the entire story and and just overhauled the entire thing and essentially started from scratch. I forgot where or when I wrote this, but I don’t think it was on this blog. But I remember writing somewhere that from all the times I’ve started this story all over again with the same characters but with a drastically different storyline I could probably make so many entirely different novels of those failed attempts, just with different character names.
So, what am I doing now, I hear some of you ask?
Well, one of the reasons I disliked the way my NaNo novel went was because it was in the third person and present tense, and it just did not work for it and sounded way to jarring. Not to mention the fact that there was next to no plot whatsoever, and if I wanted to make it a series that would really have had to change. So, until recently, I’ve barely written a word. I just could not be bothered. And now, as I’ve said, I’ve started again. I’m making it past tense (hardly anything important enough to mention), I have got a vague idea that finally, actually makes sense. I have a beginning and an end of the entire series, but I’m trying to figure out just what all the stuff in the middle could be about, and I’ve got vague idea about some of that, too.
So, really, what I’m trying to say is that I am actually getting my act together as a writer. (Like I said, don’t listen to a single word I say on this blog. I’ll probably end up doing none of what I said I would).
So, on a slightly different note, I just want to take a second to just spill my thoughts here on my writing. Why? Well, I don’t really know. I just feel like it. I just need some sort of outlet.
Warning, severe self-criticism follows!
Early on when I started writing seriously, my writing just sucked, and yet in my eyes, what I was writing was actually fairly decent. Now, I don’t think that’s too uncommon. I’m sure we’ve all experienced that, where we’ve written something, and then after a long while and you go back to it and read over it, you realise that it’s just garbage. Well, as is the case with writing, my current writing is way better than the *bleep* I wrote early on. So, in some ways, I’m glad that it’s taken me so, so, so many attempts to actually try to get these characters right, in a story that actually makes sense, both in plot and for the characters. And in some ways (Warning! Super mushy, stupid, crazy, emotional mush follows) I feel as if I’ve really connected with my characters, and so far this has been one incredible journey with them. I feel as if I’ve finally got them to their optimal personalities and traits (Is this the right context for the word ‘optimal’? Probably not) And now, I just can’t imagine writing any other characters other than them. And the fact that . . . (You know something? I am starting way too many sentences with ‘And’ or ‘So’ . . . ) Anyway, so the fact that I’ve already planned out exactly how this series will end and where I’m going to leave these characters is kind of sad. Well, for me, anyway. The thing I liked about winging it all this time was that I could keep working on the characters and was also under the illusion that if I didn’t really know what was going to happen to them, myself, I could just write these characters forever. And hey, yeah. Sure I could write prequels (Yeah right!) but . . . well, I don’t know where I’m going with this, anymore. This kind of took on a life of it’s own.
That’s unplanned blogging, for you.
Anywho. This was a blog post of mine. Completely unplanned. Completely jumbled up nonsensical mush. Three months absent has turned me into this terrible, sappy thing who produces bad quality blogs like this. That will not happen again. (But remember what I said. Do not believe I’ll do a single thing I say I’ll do on this blog) So, I’m not going to promise I’ll be back soon, because if I don’t come back soon, I won’t be a liar. I’m not going to promise that this will be the absolute last time I’m going completely restart my novel (which, of course, I’ve renamed yet again), because if I do, I won’t be a liar. And I’m not going to promise to stay active, because we all know my word means nothing, when it comes to that. So, since I’m not promising any of these things, I won’t lose any credibility if and when they do or don’t happen.
Jeez. Let’s hope my next blog (whenever that may be
, hopefully soon) won’t be so self-criticising.
Till next time guys. (Oh, I bet you’re all laughing at that)